I'm falling fast. Out of medication. Life is spiraling out of control. Cuts to hide, tears to cry. I'm grasping at air reaching for something that isn't even there, I need to hold onto something to be saved. Saved from the scariest monster I've met so far, myself. How do you win a fight when you're battling yourself. You can't get a step ahead because that other part knows what you're planning. You just have to surrender, give in, stop fighting. Surrender to self harm, suicide, the eating disorder that is destroying my life. I can't fight, I need someone to help me to hold me to care for me. Apparently I don't have that person the way I thought I did. Maybe he's having a bad day I don't know but I'm falling fast.
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